Mind WorX – Memory Bank
ONE of the major hang-ups with the way we live our lives is that we are impelled to put a tag on everything and everyone, so that we can recognize them [or it] next time. We then place that tagged image in our memory bank for future reference – which then becomes a part of our past.
When we first see a rose for instance, it is fresh and new, but the ego immediately labels the rose, then creates a folder in memory called ‘Roses’ and stores that image for future reference. The next time we see a rose, the ego immediately goes to the ‘Roses’ folder and compares it with all the other roses it has stored there.
So unless we’re very quick, we never really see a rose as a fresh new flowering bloom again, but only as a comparison and judgment, gathered from all of the roses stored in the ‘Roses’ folder from past sightings.
Someone yells out to you, “Come quick and look at the beautiful sunset.” You rush outside and there it is, in all its glory. If you are on the ball, you may have the chance to observe this vista for a second as fresh and new, a sight to behold.
That is unlikely though, for in the split second from first seeing that sunset, the ego grabs the image and hastily opens its folder of sunsets stored in memory, catalogues it, compares it, puts a rating on it, then packs that image away with the rest to become part of the reference library for sunsets of the future.
So, unless you are living in the now moment, you are not aware of the freshness and newness of that amazing view, but only of a composite judgment of a sunset gathered from all the past sunsets stored in your ‘Sunsets’ folder.
You are about to meet someone for the first time. Before meeting, you imagine what that person may look like. Your ego creates a new folder with that person’s name on it and places those ‘what they may look like’ images in it. When you meet, most times they look nothing like what you have imagined, so now your ego catalogues their actual image, clouded by all its judgments of them at first sight and put those into that folder.
The next time you meet, your ego immediately digs up that folder, catalogues this newest image and then puts an updated judgment on that person, gathered from all the images in that folder – including those ‘what they may look like’ images that are permanently stored there.
These folders not only contain what that person looks like, but what you may have heard about them from gossip and how they treated you in the past – whether they were: cruel/kind, angry/compassionate etc. Nothing is overlooked. Every nuance is recorded and placed in that folder, never to be forgotten.
So, once again, you are not looking at that person as they actually are now, but filtered through the egos images and judgments from all the – ever accumulating – past encounters with that person.
Not only does the ego create a folder for everything and everyone it comes in contact with, it also creates subfolders within that folder. Take for instance, a man and a woman meet. The man’s ego opens his ‘Female’ folder that holds many of these subfolders. The ego then makes judgments of that female. It may go something like this…
Main folder: ‘FEMALE’. Subfolders – girl/woman, tall/short, fat/skinny, old/young, blond/brunette/redhead, good looking/not so good looking, downright ugly/absolutely ravishing, not for sex/can’t wait to get into bed with her.
The woman does exactly the same only she has created a ‘MALE’ folder with its accompanying subfolders. These folders and subfolders not only contain the images and judgments of that particular person, but of every person encountered over their lifetime, all catalogued and sorted out into all those many subfolders.
In this way, the ego can make judgments on everyone and everything, based on the past images and feelings stored in those millions of folders and subfolders packed away in past memories.
THE CRAZY LIBRARIAN
The ego is a bit like a crazy librarian, bustling about in its memory bank of the past. When an event occurs in the now moment, the ego takes no real notice of it, but rather, immediately races off into its library of past occurrences and digs up the appropriate folder that corresponds most closely to that event.
The ego creates folders and subfolders for all the five senses, then judges and catalogues every feeling, every emotion that you have ever felt from birth and stores them for future reference – for every time a similar feeling crops up.
To look through the eyes of the ego is to live in the past with its massive library. Conscious awareness is simply being conscious of what your ego is doing to you and how much of life you are really missing out on.
The new age saying, ‘Live in the now moment’ bypasses the crazy ego and its library of the past, allowing you to see the beauty that surrounds you ‘now’. That is a very hard thing to do – but we are getting there.
Dan’s Quote: “It is not the strongest of the species that survive…..
___________Nor the most intelligent…..
___________But the one most responsive to change.”- Charles Darwin